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Why were the flies playing football in a saucer?

They were playing for the cup.

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Food & Drinks

What kind of water do fireworks like?

Sparkling.

a cat is playing with a roll of toilet paper in the bathroomAnimals

Why did the cat go to the bathroom in the trash can?

Because it's a litter box.

Outdoors

What's another term for a sleeping bag?

A nap sack.

Outdoors

What's the ocean's favorite song?

Surfin' USA.

Puns

How do fireflies start a race?

Ready, steady, glow.

Animals

What's the world's weakest animal?

A toad, he croaks if you even touch him.

Thanos?Entertainment

What's Thanos' favorite app to talk to friends?

Snap chat.

Professional

Did you take the patient's temperature?

No. Is it missing?

Food & Drinks

Why was the dairy grumpy?

It was sour cream.

Puns

Why should you be worried about the calendar?

Its days are numbered.

Travel

Where do fruit travel to on vacation?

Pear-is.

Holiday

What do snowmen eat for breakfast?

Snowflakes.

Holiday

Did you hear that one of Santa's reindeer now works for Proctor and Gamble?

Comet cleans sinks.

People

What type of shoes in a ninja's favorite?

Sneakers.

Puns

What did the painter say to the wall?

One more crack and I'll plaster you.

Animals

What do you say to the tree frog who needs a lift?

Hop in.