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Why was the pirate late for work?

His ship had sailed.

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Puns

What kind of shoes do robots wear during the winter?

Roboots.

Entertainment

Where did Captain Hook purchase his hook?

At the local second-hand store.

Animals

What do you call a fish wearing a tux?

Sofishticated.

Animals

Why is an elephant braver than a hen?

Because the elephant isn't chicken.

Entertainment

What do you get if you cross a science fiction film with a toad?

Star Warts.

Food & Drinks

How does one gelatin greet another?

Jello!

Puns

What's an ocean's favorite playlist?

Nep-tunes.

Animals

There were four cats in a boat. One jumped out. How many were left?

None. They were all copy cats.

a view looking up through green trees in a forest with the sun shining throughOutdoors

Why are trees so good at interior design?

They know how to Spruce a place up.

Outdoors

Why do trees have so many friends?

They branch out.

Outdoors

What happens when grass goes out of town?

It's a field day!

Entertainment

Why did I name my printer Bob Marley?

Because it's always jammin'.

Puns

How did the mermaid call her friends?

On her shell phone, of course.

Animals

What happens when a frog's car dies?

He has it toad.

Food & Drinks

What did the pear say to the celery stick?

Quit stalking me.

Puns

What is the difference between a fly and a bird?

A bird can fly but a fly can't bird.