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Why was the golfer also good at Formula One?

He had a strong driver.

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Professional

When do astronauts eat?

At launch time.

Puns

What did the adding machine say to the cashier?

You can count on me.

Animals

What do you get if you cross a dog with a telephone?

A golden receiver.

Holiday

What did Adam say on the day before Christmas?

It's Christmas, Eve.

Animals

What dinosaur would win the track gold medal at the Olympics?

The Prontosaurus.

Animals

What happens when a frog's car dies?

He has it toad.

a close-up of a red pen and paper with an A+ written on itEducation

Why did the wizard ace his math test?

It was on magic squares.

Puns

What's a toad's favorite sweet?

Lollihops.

Animals

Why was the glow worm unhappy?

Because her children weren't that bright.

Animals

How do you stop an angry elephant from charging?

Take away its credit cards.

Education

What happened to the Dean who lost his job?

He lost his ideanity.

Puns

Did you hear about the power outlet who got into a fight with a power cord?

He really thought he could socket to him.

Food & Drinks

Why did the tomato go out with the prune?

Because she couldn't find a date.

Puns

What did the rug say to the floor?

I've got you covered.

Puns

What kind of shoes do you make with banana skins?

Slippers.

Animals

What do you say if you meet a toad?

Wart's new?