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Why was the chameleon such a good cashier?

It knew how to quickly make change.

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Sports

What's the best way to watch a fly fishing tournament?

Live stream.

Puns

What did the obituary say for the pot of boiling water?

You will be mist.

Animals

Why do worms taste like chewing gum?

Because they're wrigleys.

Animals

What's a toad's favorite ballet?

Swamp Lake.

Animals

What do you call the dog magician?

A labra-cadabra.

Puns

What shape has a knighthood?

Cir-cle.

Animals

What's the biggest moth in the world?

A mammoth.

Animals

What animal has 20/20 vision?

A see-lion.

Education

Which letter is the sleepiest in the alphabet?

E, because it's always in bed.

Outdoors

Which plant has the best roar?

A dandelion.

Sports

What is the difference between Yankee fans and dentists?

One roots for the yanks, and the other yanks for the roots.

Astronaut's baby?Science

How do you stop an astronaut's baby from crying?

You rocket.

a caddy of various cleaning supplies, including soap, sponges, gloves, spray, etc.Education

Why was the janitor looking for cleaning products in the math department?

Because he heard there are lots of solutions.

Puns

What insect runs away from everything?

A flee.

Puns

What did one bunny say about the other bunny's new updo?

I like your hare!

Political

How did Barack ask Michelle to be his wife?

He bought a ring, got on one knee, and said "Will you marry me? I don't wanna be Obamaself."