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Why is a computer so smart?

Because it listens to its motherboard.

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Animals

What animal makes the best lunches?

A peanut butter and jelly fish.

Animals

What do you call a golden retriever at the beach in July?

A hot dog.

Education

Why was the grandma always getting A's on her papers?

She had a knack for gram-mer.

Puns

Why should you be worried about the calendar?

Its days are numbered.

Animals

Why did the chicken cross the net?

It wanted to get to the other site.

Food & Drinks

Why are pigs so good at building houses?

They bring plenty of ham-mers.

Current Events

Who do insects see to get their taxes done?

An account-ant.

Animals

What do you say if you meet a toad?

Wart's new?

Professional

Why did the Uber driver get fired?

The passengers kept reporting him for going the extra mile.

Education

Why was the grandma always getting A's on her papers?

She had a knack for gram-mer.

a close-up of a large brown bat hanging upside downSports

What type of bat doesn't fly?

A baseball bat.

Peter Pan?People

Why is Peter Pan always flying?

He neverlands.

Animals

Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station.

Animals

What do you call the dog magician?

A labra-cadabra.

Puns

Why shouldn't you buy anything with velcro?

They're a total rip-off.

Puns

Which birds steal soap from the bath?

Robber ducks.