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Why does the photon not need a suitcase?
Because it's traveling light.
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Science
Why do rocket scientists take everything so seriously?
Because they understand the gravity of the situation.
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Animals
What did the duck say as he was buying chapstick?
Just put it on my bill.
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Puns
What's another name for your iPhone charger?
Apple juice.
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Animals
Why was the glow worm unhappy?
Because her children weren't that bright.
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Animals
Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom?
Because the "P" is silent.
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Family
What do moms say is bad for both family trips and sleeping?
A wet blanket.
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Animals
What do you get if you cross a parrot with an elephant?
An animal that tells you everything that it remembers.
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People
What's a pirate's favorite letter?
You may think it's R, but it's really the C that they love.
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Science
Why are bakers so good at math?
They love Pi!
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Animals
How do you spell mousetrap in just three letters?
C-A-T.
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People
What happened when the guy walked into the bar?
He was disqualified from the limbo contest.
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Sports
Where do football directors go when they are fed up?
The bored room.
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People
What happened when the guy walked into the bar?
He was disqualified from the limbo contest.
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Animals
Why do worms taste like chewing gum?
Because they're wrigleys.
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Entertainment
Why did the God of Thunder need to stretch his muscles so much when he was a kid?
He was a little Thor.
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Sports
Which goalkeeper can jump higher than a crossbar?
All of them, a crossbar can't jump.
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