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Why do vampires always look sick?

They keep coffin.

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a close-up of a person filling out a multiple-choice test card with an alarm clock sitting nearbyVehicles

Which vehicle did the best on its SATs?

The Smart Car.

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Puns

Why do mice need oiling?

Because they squeak.

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two auto mechanics are using a tablet while fixing an engineProfessional

People are so hard on car mechanics.

They can't catch a brake.

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Animals

Why are frogs always happy?

They eat what bugs them.

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Animals

What do you call a kangaroo's lazy joey?

Pouch potato.

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Puns

What did the tomato say to the ear of corn?

Can you ear me?

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Animals

What animal scores the most in basketball?

A dunk-ey.

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Animals

Why did the whale cross the road?

To get to the other tide.

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Puns

Why do cows like being told jokes?

Because they like being amoosed.

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Food & Drinks

Why did the tomato go out with the prune?

Because she couldn't find a date.

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Professional

Why did the barber win the race?

She knew shortcuts.

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Animals

What animal loves to sway side-to-side?

A lean-mur.

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Animals

What do you call a cow with two legs?

Eileen.

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Food & Drinks

What is the most attractive fruit?

A fine-apple.

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Sports

What tea do footballers drink?

Penaltea.

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dentist appointment?Professional

What time is your dentist appointment?

Tooth hurt-y.

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