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Why do rabbits make good jewelers?

They can tell the best carrot.

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Food & Drinks

What did the bread say when he proposed to his girlfriend?

I loaf you!

Puns

Who sits in a corner all day but somehow still travels the world?

A stamp.

The penguins?Animals

How does a penguin build its house?

Igloos it together.

Holiday

How is a sofa like a Thanksgiving turkey?

Because they're both full of stuffing.

Puns

What do you get if you cross a pile of mud with a pig?

A groundhog.

People

Who was the greatest financier in the Bible?

Noah. He was floating his stock while everyone else was in liquidation.

Animals

What does a queen bee do when she burps?

Issues a royal pardon.

Puns

Why don't eggs tell each other jokes?

Because they'd crack each other up.

Animals

What do you call a lion who has eaten your mother's sister?

An aunt-eater.

Animals

What animal is best at avoiding a punch?

A duck.

Education

What's a snake's favorite subject in school?

Hissssss-tory.

Animals

What do you call an elephant that doesn't matter?

Irrelephant!

Animals

What did the wasp do when he got hot?

He took off his yellow jacket.

Animals

What do you get if you cross some ants with some tics?

All sorts of antics.

Holiday

What Easter candy has tons of friends?

Peeps!

two dolphins are talking to each otherAnimals

What's the ocean's funniest animal?

A clownfish.