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Why do piggy banks give the best advice?

Because they're filled with so much common cents.

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Animals

Why do rodents make the best runners?

Because life's a rat race.

The ducks?Animals

What do ducks get after they eat?

A bill!

Puns

What kind of tiles can't you stick on walls?

Reptiles.

Science

Why was the math book sad?

It had a lot of problems.

Animals

Why do spiders always know the answer to everything?

They're very good at finding things on the web.

Vehicles

Where did the boat go when it was sick?

The boat doc.

Animals

What kind of dog does Dracula have?

A bloodhound.

Retired veggies?Food & Drinks

What do you call a retired vegetable?

A has-bean.

Vehicles

What car doesn't seem to go anywhere?

A stationary wagon.

Animals

What is the definition of Robin?

A bird who steals.

a woman is signing an autograph while photographers are taking her picturePeople

Who is the nicest celebrity around?

Tom Thanks.

Puns

Why are glow worms good to carry in your bag?

They can lighten your load.

Travel

Which celebrity loves to go on vacation?

Tom Cruise.

Entertainment

Why did I name my printer Bob Marley?

Because it's always jammin'.

Puns

What's an ocean's favorite playlist?

Nep-tunes.

People

How did Benjamin Franklin feel when he discovered electricity?

Shocked!