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Why do mama kangaroos hate rainy days?
Because their kids have to play inside all day.
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Animals
What did the wasp do when he got hot?
He took off his yellow jacket.
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Animals
Why did the tadpole feel lonely?
Because he was newt to the area.
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Animals
Why didn't the elephant buy a suitcase for his summer camp?
Because he already had a trunk!
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Music
What musical instrument is found in the bathroom?
A tuba toothpaste.
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Animals
What animal loves Indian food?
A dal-matian.
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Holiday
What did Adam say on the day before Christmas?
It's Christmas, Eve.
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Puns
How was the wedding?
So beautiful! Even the cake was in tiers!
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Puns
Who do green peas see when they aren't feeling well?
A pod-iatrist.
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Animals
What does a cat go to sleep on?
A caterpillow.
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Holiday
If Santa Claus and Mrs. Claus had a child, what would he be called?
A subordinate claus.
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Outdoors
Why do crabs never give to charity?
Because they are shellfish.
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Puns
How are you liking that anti-gravity book?
It's impossible to put down!
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Education
Anyone know the formula for water? Sure. That's easy, said one man. What is it? H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O.
H to O.
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Animals
What did the sardine call the submarine?
A can of people.
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Education
What's chips and guac's favorite constellation?
The Big Dipper.
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Professional
What do you get a lawyer for his birthday?
Briefs.
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