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Why do diners never serve lobster?

They're shellfish.

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Current Events

What's a storm cloud's favorite Garth Brooks song?

When the Thunder Rolls.

Animals

What animal has more lives than a cat?

A frog, because it croaks every night.

Animals

Why do elephants have trunks?

Because they've no pockets to put things in.

Outdoors

Why did the body of water think so much?

It liked to pond-er.

Animals

What do you call the dog magician?

A labra-cadabra.

Food & Drinks

Why did the lemon stop in the middle of the road?

It ran out of juice.

Animals

What do you call a litter of young dogs who have come in from the snow?

Slush puppies.

Entertainment

What superhero often gets mistaken for photography equipment?

The Flash.

Education

What do librarians use as bait when they go fishing?

Book worms.

Puns

How can you tell if a tree is a dogwood?

By its bark.

Professional

Why did the nurse always choose the red crayon?

Because she always has to draw blood.

a person eating popcorn sits on their couch and pauses the show they're watching with a remote controlVehicles

What's a car's favorite TV show?

Law and Order SUV.

Puns

What kind of tree can you hold in one hand?

A palm tree.

Puns

What do insects learn at school?

Mothmatics.

Puns

What do you call someone who sees a robbery at an Apple Store?

The iWitness.

Entertainment

What did the teacher say when the Demogorgon showed up in their classroom?

Stranger things have happened.