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Why did the turkey cross the road?

To prove he wasn't chicken.

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Puns

How can you tell if a tree is a dogwood?

By its bark.

Puns

What makes a glow worm glow?

A light meal.

Puns

What did the shower say to the toilet?

You look a bit flushed.

Sports

What do an English major and a football player have in common?

They get anxious over rough drafts.

Cat's breakfast?Animals

What do cats eat for breakfast?

Mice Krispies.

a man is smiling while taking a picture Professional

Why did the photographer attract so many mice?

She was always saying cheese.

Puns

Why did the unwashed chicken cross the road twice?

Because he was a dirty double-crosser.

Puns

What shape has a knighthood?

Cir-cle.

Science

Why did the mathematician decline a beer at the party?

He didn't want to drink and derive.

Animals

What do you call a fish wearing a tux?

Sofishticated.

Holiday

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?

Because he didn't have the guts.

Entertainment

Which kitchen ingredient can also sing?

Grease.

Cat's breakfast?Animals

What do cats eat for breakfast?

Mice Krispies.

Outdoors

What happens when grass goes out of town?

It's a field day!

Animals

Where do baby apes sleep?

In apricots.

Animals

What did the horse say when it collapsed?

"Help! I've fallen and I can't giddyup!"