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Why did the Roman chicken cross the road?
Because she was afraid someone would caesar.
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Puns
What did the sneaky chick say when it came out of the egg?
Time to hatch a plan!
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Political
Which bureau of the US government has the best breath?
The Mint.
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Puns
How do you make antifreeze?
You steal her blanket.
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Sports
Why does someone who runs marathons make a good student?
Because education pays off in the long run.
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Political
What's the difference between a politician and a snail?
One is slimy, a pest, and leaves a trail everywhere and the other is a snail.
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Food & Drinks
What kind of water do fireworks like?
Sparkling.
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People
What do a tick and the Louvre have in common?
They are both Paris sites.
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Animals
What did the fish say when he hit a concrete wall?
Dam.
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Puns
What do cows like to dance to?
Any kind of moosic you like.
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Food & Drinks
What kind of friends should you take to dinner?
Your taste buds.
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Professional
Want to hear a joke about construction?
I'm still working on it.
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Sports
What do you call a volleyball with a bad attitude?
Rebel Wilson.
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Current Events
Who do insects see to get their taxes done?
An account-ant.
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Animals
What sort of clothes does a pet dog wear?
A petticoat.
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Sports
Why did the goal post get angry?
Because the bar was rattled!
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Education
Knock knock. Who's there? Spell. Spell who?
W-H-O.
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