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Why did the man give up being a taxi driver?

There was too much talking behind his back.

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Puns

What is a duck's favorite dance?

The quackstep.

Puns

When should you start writing a book?

When you have a novel idea.

Entertainment

Why did the mirror cross the road?

To see itself!

Food & Drinks

Why was the chip acting so goofy?

He was a cheese-ball.

Entertainment

What's the name of Iron Man's thieving younger brother?

Steel-man.

bird drinking?Animals

How many beers does it take to get a tropical bird drunk?

Toucans!

three orca whales come to the surface of the waterPuns

Why do orcas love to gossip?

They always have a whale of a tale.

Holiday

What is a mom's favorite game?

Mother, may I!

Sports

What runs around a baseball field but stays still at the same time?

A fence.

Animals

What do you call a pig's sore eye?

A pig-stye.

Animals

Why was the moose able to move the bus on his own?

He had huge mooscles.

Holiday

What Easter candy has tons of friends?

Peeps!

Animals

Why did the chicken cross the net?

It wanted to get to the other site.

People

Why can't the lifeguards save the hippies?

Because they're too far out.

Outdoors

What happens when grass goes out of town?

It's a field day!

Entertainment

Why does Snoop Dogg always have an umbrella with him?

Fo' drizzle.