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Why did the elk have great hair?

It used a lot of moose.

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Animals

Why did the elephant eat the candle?

For light refreshment.

Sports

What do an English major and a football player have in common?

They get anxious over rough drafts.

People

Which celebrity loves to read?

Elliot Page.

Music

What do you call a dog that's blasting out music at the bottom of the ocean?

A subwoofer.

Family

Who are crows' favorite family members?

Caw-sins.

a close-up of cola being poured into a glass and then overflowingFood & Drinks

What carbonated beverage has a future career in music?

Pop.

Animals

Why are elephants wiser than chickens?

Have you ever heard of Kentucky Fried Elephant?

Holiday

What's always playing in Santa's workshop?

Wrap music.

four pigs are grazing in a grassy fieldPuns

What do you call a pig with no clothes on?

Streaky bacon.

Animals

What kind of bees hum and drop things?

A fumble bee.

Puns

How often should you make chemistry jokes?

Periodically.

Vehicles

What do donkeys take to go to the store?

A horse and buggy.

Animals

What do you call the hen that regularly counts her eggs?

A mathmachicken.

Holiday

Why aren't there any knock-knock jokes about the United States?

Because freedom rings.

Puns

What kind of tiles can't you stick on walls?

Reptiles.

Puns

Why didn't the lamp sink in the water?

Because it was too light.