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Why did the elephant eat the candle?

For light refreshment.

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Animals

What animal scores the most in basketball?

A dunk-ey.

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Animals

What is the definition of Robin?

A bird who steals.

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Sports

When fish play football, who is the captain?

The team's kipper.

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Puns

Why was the picture sent to jail?

It was framed.

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Animals

Why is it called a litter of puppies?

Because they mess up the whole house.

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Puns

What kind of shoes do you make with banana skins?

Slippers.

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People

How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?

Rename the mail folder to Instruction Manuals.

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Animals

Why did the whale cross the road?

To get to the other tide.

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Food & Drinks

Why do we never tell jokes about pizza?

They're too cheesy.

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Sports

Why can't Cinderella play soccer?

Because she's always running away from the ball!

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two Basset hounds wearing sunglasses and ties sit together in front of a yellow backgroundAnimals

What animal dresses the most fashionably?

A hip-po.

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The penguins?Animals

How does a penguin build its house?

Igloos it together.

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Puns

Why should you wear leather when trying to stay unnoticed?

Because it's made of hide.

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Animals

What sort of clothes does a pet dog wear?

A petticoat.

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Professional

Why did the nurse always choose the red crayon?

Because she always has to draw blood.

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Puns

Why did the scarecrow win an award?

It was outstanding in its field.

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