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Why did the chocolate chip cookie go to the doctor?

Because it was feeling crummy.

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Puns

Why did the man decide to sell his vacuum?

It was gathering dust.

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Astronaut's baby?Science

How do you stop an astronaut's baby from crying?

You rocket.

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People

How did Benjamin Franklin feel when he discovered electricity?

Shocked!

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Outdoors

Why did everyone want to be near the volcano?

Because it's just so lava-ble.

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Animals

Why do mama kangaroos hate rainy days?

Because their kids have to play inside all day.

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Animals

What is the only kind of dog you can eat?

A hot dog.

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Food & Drinks

Why did the ice cream truck break down?

Because of the rocky road.

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Puns

How do you make a Kleenex dance?

You put a little boogie in it.

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Puns

What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

Use a cowculator.

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Animals

Why is the snail the strongest animal?

Because he carries a house on his back.

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Family

What did the baby horse say when his mom asked if he was hungry?

No, I'm foal!

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Puns

Why don't eggs tell each other jokes?

Because they'd crack each other up.

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Holiday

What is a condiment's favorite holiday?

Cinco de Mayo.

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Sports

What do you call a basketball player with a drooling problem?

Double dribble.

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Animals

Why do rodents make the best runners?

Because life's a rat race.

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Sports

What is the difference between baseball and law?

In baseball, if you're caught stealing, you're out.

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