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Why did the chicken cross the playground?

To get to the other slide.

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Animals

What kind of bird can write?

A PENguin.

Puns

What kind of tree can you hold in one hand?

A palm tree.

two Basset hounds wearing sunglasses and ties sit together in front of a yellow backgroundAnimals

What animal dresses the most fashionably?

A hip-po.

Professional

Did you know you can actually listen to the blood in your veins?

You just have to listen varicosely.

People

What did Snow White say while waiting in line for her photos?

Some day my prints will come.

Animals

Why was the fish so smart?

It lived in a school.

People

Why did the runner quit the race against bigfoot?

He couldn't face defeet!

Puns

What kind of pole is short and floppy?

A tadpole.

Animals

What do you call a kangaroo's lazy joey?

Pouch potato.

two colorful tropical fish are swimming near each otherPuns

What did the boy fish say to his girlfriend?

Your plaice or mine?

Vehicles

Will invisible planes ever be popular?

No. I can't see them taking off.

Animals

What do you call a 100-year-old frog?

An old croak.

Political

What building always gets stains on it?

The White House.

Entertainment

What did the teacher say when the Demogorgon showed up in their classroom?

Stranger things have happened.

turquoise blue waves are about to crash on a beachCurrent Events

Why was the ocean too hot to swim in?

It had a heat wave.

Puns

Imagine you're in a room with no windows and no doors, how do you get out?

Stop imagining.