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Why did Santa spell Christmas N-O-E?

Because the angel said, "No L!"

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Education

Why did the comedian keep telling jokes about chemistry?

He was looking for a good reaction.

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Food & Drinks

How does a taco bless the table?

"Lettuce pray."

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Puns

Why is oxygen so wealthy?

Because it's an air-ess.

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Puns

What's an ocean's favorite playlist?

Nep-tunes.

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Animals

Where do ants go to eat?

At a restaurant.

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Family

How did the baby tell her mom that she had a wet diaper?

She sent her a pee-mail.

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Puns

What do you do when two snails fight?

Let them slug it out.

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Puns

What is a duck's favorite dance?

The quackstep.

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Animals

What do you call a 100-year-old ant?

An antique.

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Sports

What do sprinters eat before a race?

Nothing, they fast!

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Sports

What's the loudest sport?

Racket-ball.

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Puns

If you had to vote which one is faster, would you choose hot or cold?

Hot! Because you can definitely catch a cold.

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Puns

What is the difference between a fly and a bird?

A bird can fly but a fly can't bird.

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Puns

How do you make a Kleenex dance?

You put a little boogie in it.

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The Basketball Players?Travel

Why can't basketball players go on vacation?

They aren't allowed to travel.

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Vehicles

Which big cat loves to drive?

A jaguar.

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