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Why can't Cinderella play soccer?

Because she's always running away from the ball!

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Animals

What do you call a 100-year-old frog?

An old croak.

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Food & Drinks

How do eggs end a TV show?

That's all, yolks!

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Sports

What is the difference between Yankee fans and dentists?

One roots for the yanks, and the other yanks for the roots.

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Outdoors

What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back?

A stick.

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Entertainment

Why are ET's eyes so big?

Because he saw the phone bill.

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Animals

Why was the fish so smart?

It lived in a school.

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Holiday

What do you call Santa's Helpers?

Subordinate clauses.

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Puns

What do you do if you're afraid of elevators?

Take steps to avoid them.

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People

What do people call Arnold Schwarzenegger in retirement?

The Exterminator.

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Music

What do you call berries playing the guitar?

A jam session.

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Outdoors

Why do trees have so many friends?

They branch out.

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Animals

How long do chickens work?

Around the cluck.

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Animals

What do you get if you cross a sheepdog with a rose?

A collie-flower.

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Animals

What is the biggest ant in the world?

An elephant.

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Family

Who are crows' favorite family members?

Caw-sins.

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Animals

What is the definition of Robin?

A bird who steals.

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