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Why are bankers so good at American politics?

It's a system of checks and balances!

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Education

What words make the best athletes?

Pro-nouns.

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Puns

What's another name for your iPhone charger?

Apple juice.

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Puns

If you had to vote which one is faster, would you choose hot or cold?

Hot! Because you can definitely catch a cold.

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a white and tan spotted pony appears to smile at the cameraAnimals

Why couldn't the pony speak at the convention?

It was too hoarse.

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a person puts a chlorine tablet into a chemical feeder for a poolSports

What game does chlorine never lose?

Pool.

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Music

What's a balloon's least favorite type of music?

Pop.

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Holiday

What's Father Christmas called when he takes a rest while delivering presents?

Santa pause.

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Outdoors

What's the ocean's favorite song?

Surfin' USA.

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Animals

What kind of dog loves to eat?

A Chow.

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Puns

What happened to the city in France where the cheese factory exploded?

Da brie was flying everywhere.

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Sports

Why did the basketball player have so many good arguments?

He was the point guard.

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People

Which servant of God was the most flagrant lawbreaker in the Bible?

Moses. He broke all 10 commandments at once.

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Entertainment

What did the teacher say when the Demogorgon showed up in their classroom?

Stranger things have happened.

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Education

How many letters are there in the alphabet?

Twenty-four, because E.T. went home.

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a nurse attends to four babies each in their own hospital bassinetPuns

What do you call it when the maternity ward is low-staffed?

A mid-wife-crisis!

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Education

Why did the clock get removed from the library?

Because it tocked too much.

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