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Who was the greatest financier in the Bible?

Noah. He was floating his stock while everyone else was in liquidation.

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Puns

What shape has a knighthood?

Cir-cle.

Sports

What do two oxygen molecule friends call each other?

Air buds.

Puns

Why did the scarecrow win an award?

It was outstanding in its field.

Holiday

What is a ghost's favorite bedtime story?

Little Boo Peep!

Puns

What do cows like to dance to?

Any kind of moosic you like.

Puns

Why am I no longer addicted to the hokey pokey?

I turned myself around.

Food & Drinks

How does one gelatin greet another?

Jello!

Animals

Where do baby cats learn to swim?

The kitty pool.

Animals

What kind of birds do you usually find locked up?

Jail-birds.

Puns

Why should you be worried about the calendar?

Its days are numbered.

Puns

How could the dolphin afford to buy a house?

He prawned everything.

Puns

Why does the photon not need a suitcase?

Because it's traveling light.

Puns

Why were the atoms always hungry?

Their food is microscopic!

a close-up of a pot of chili being stirredPeople

Which musician loves to make chili?

Rod Stew-art.

Puns

Why don't eggs tell each other jokes?

Because they'd crack each other up.

Animals

What is the biggest ant in the world?

An elephant.