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Who do green peas see when they aren't feeling well?

A pod-iatrist.

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Holiday

What did Adam say on the day before Christmas?

It's Christmas, Eve.

The Baseball?Sports

Did you hear the joke about the pop fly?

Forget it. It's way over your head.

Puns

What do insects learn at school?

Mothmatics.

Food & Drinks

Did you hear about the famous pickle?

He was a big dill.

Food & Drinks

Why did the chocolate chip cookie go to the doctor?

Because it was feeling crummy.

Education

How many letters are there in the alphabet?

Twenty-four, because E.T. went home.

Vehicles

Why are Olympians so picky about their vehicles?

They'll only drive a sports car.

Holiday

Did you hear that one of Santa's reindeer now works for Proctor and Gamble?

Comet cleans sinks.

Puns

What is the opposite of cock-a-doodle-doo?

Cock-a-doodle-don't.

crowded graveyard?Holiday

It's Crowded!

This graveyard looks overcrowded. People must be dying to get in.

Education

Knock knock. Who's there? Spell. Spell who?

W-H-O.

Baseball armor?Sports

When should baseball players wear armor?

When they're playing knight games.

Outdoors

Does your shoe have a hole in it?

Of course, it's where my foot goes!

Education

What's a snake's favorite subject in school?

Hissssss-tory.

Puns

When Sunday and Monday get into a fight, who typically wins?

Sunday, because Monday is a week-day.

no body?Puns

What do you call someone with no body and no nose?

Nobody knows!