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Which subject has two parts?
Bi-ology.
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Professional
Why couldn't the couple get married at the library?
It was all booked up.
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Puns
She Needed Her Balance Checked!
Today at the bank, an old lady asked me to check her balance. So I pushed her over!
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People
Which servant of God was the most flagrant lawbreaker in the Bible?
Moses. He broke all 10 commandments at once.
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Puns
What is a plane full of male cows called?
A bull flight.
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Entertainment
What do you call a musical about a boy who loses his shoe?
Cinderfella.
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Animals
How does a penguin build its house?
Igloos it together.
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Animals
What do you get if you cross a trout with an apartment?
A flat fish.
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Animals
What's a bee's favorite novel?
The Great Gats-bee.
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Puns
Why is it wrong to steal a thesaurus?
Because people have no words for how angry it makes them.
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Puns
Why was the picture sent to jail?
It was framed.
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Family
What type of school do kids beg to go to during the summertime?
Sundae School.
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Education
Why is a computer so smart?
Because it listens to its motherboard.
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Animals
Why did the cow cross the road?
To get to the udder side.
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Animals
Why did the bird sell so much at the flea market?
It was great at hawking its wares.
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Puns
What do you give a pony with a cold?
Cough stirrup.
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Current Events
What do you get when two plants kiss?
Tulips!
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