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Which state has the best streets?

Rhode Island.

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a view looking up through green trees in a forest with the sun shining throughOutdoors

Why are trees so good at interior design?

They know how to Spruce a place up.

Entertainment

Which kitchen ingredient can also sing?

Grease.

Puns

How can you tell if a tree is a dogwood?

By its bark.

Puns

Which birds steal soap from the bath?

Robber ducks.

Entertainment

Why did the man buy the discounted TV with a broken volume control?

He couldn't turn it down.

Puns

Why does the photon not need a suitcase?

Because it's traveling light.

Puns

What do you call a woman who sets fire to all her bills?

Bernadette.

Puns

What kind of things does a farmer talk about when he is milking cows?

Udder nonsense.

Education

Why was school so much easier for cavemen?

There was no history class.

Animals

Which bear always goes to timeout for being condescending to other bears?

A pan-duh!

Holiday

Why is April the cleanest month of all?

Spring cleaning!

Puns

What shape has a knighthood?

Cir-cle.

Animals

What games do ants play with elephants?

Squash.

Entertainment

What do you call it when Batman skips church?

Christian Bale.

Puns

If you had fifteen cows and five goats what would you have?

Plenty of milk.

Puns

How can you tell if a tree is a dogwood?

By its bark.