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Where would you put an injured insect?
In an antbulance.
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Animals
How do you raise a baby elephant?
With a forklift truck.
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Sports
What do a baseball team and a baker have in common?
They need a good batter!
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Professional
Why did the man give up being a taxi driver?
There was too much talking behind his back.
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Outdoors
Why did the body of water think so much?
It liked to pond-er.
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Animals
What happens when a cow doesn't shave?
It grows a moostache.
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Animals
How does a polar bear build a house?
Igloos it together.
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Animals
Why did the chicken cross the net?
It wanted to get to the other site.
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Holiday
What Easter candy has tons of friends?
Peeps!
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Entertainment
What do you call fowl that fly into windows?
Angry birds.
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Puns
Who has eight guns and terrorizes the ocean?
Billy the Squid.
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Current Events
When do flowers get their workout in?
Spring Training.
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Sports
Why did the coach go to the bank?
To get his quarter back!!!
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People
What happened when the guy walked into the bar?
He was disqualified from the limbo contest.
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Animals
What kind of dog wears a uniform and medals?
A guard dog.
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Puns
What is a horse's favorite sport?
Stable tennis.
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Food & Drinks
What's the worst kind of bread for sandwiches?
Meatloaf.
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