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Where would you put an injured insect?

In an antbulance.

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Animals

How do you raise a baby elephant?

With a forklift truck.

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Sports

What do a baseball team and a baker have in common?

They need a good batter!

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Why quit taxi?Professional

Why did the man give up being a taxi driver?

There was too much talking behind his back.

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Outdoors

Why did the body of water think so much?

It liked to pond-er.

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Animals

What happens when a cow doesn't shave?

It grows a moostache.

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Animals

How does a polar bear build a house?

Igloos it together.

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Animals

Why did the chicken cross the net?

It wanted to get to the other site.

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Holiday

What Easter candy has tons of friends?

Peeps!

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Entertainment

What do you call fowl that fly into windows?

Angry birds.

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Puns

Who has eight guns and terrorizes the ocean?

Billy the Squid.

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Current Events

When do flowers get their workout in?

Spring Training.

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Coached Bank?Sports

Why did the coach go to the bank?

To get his quarter back!!!

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People

What happened when the guy walked into the bar?

He was disqualified from the limbo contest.

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Animals

What kind of dog wears a uniform and medals?

A guard dog.

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Puns

What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis.

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Food & Drinks

What's the worst kind of bread for sandwiches?

Meatloaf.

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