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What's the saddest part of the week?

Monday mourning.

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Puns

What do you find at the end of everything?

The letter G.

Entertainment

What did the baby laptop call her father?

Data.

Family

What did the tree say when his kid wanted an expensive toy?

Money doesn't grow on me, you know.

Animals

What's the world's weakest animal?

A toad, he croaks if you even touch him.

Education

To whoever stole my copy of Microsoft Office, I will find you.

You have my Word!

The roof?Puns

Did you hear the joke about the roof?

Never mind, it's over your head.

Animals

What did the dog say when he sat on sandpaper?

Rough Rough!

Animals

What do you call octopus twins?

Itenticle.

Animals

Why do cats love to work?

They're purr-fect at everything they do.

Holiday

What is the best Christmas present ever?

A broken drum-you can't beat it.

pecan nuts?Food & Drinks

What did the pecan say to the walnut?

We're friends because we are both nuts!

Professional

You know there's no official training for trash collectors?

They just pick things up as they go along.

Animals

What does a cat go to sleep on?

A caterpillow.

People

What's a pirate's favorite letter?

You may think it's R, but it's really the C that they love.

Animals

Where does the stingray's husband hang out?

In his man-ta cave.

Puns

Which birds steal soap from the bath?

Robber ducks.