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What's always playing in Santa's workshop?

Wrap music.

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Puns

Why should you wear leather when trying to stay unnoticed?

Because it's made of hide.

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Puns

What did the clean dog say to the insect?

Long time, no flea.

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Puns

What did one angel say to the other angel?

Halo there.

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Animals

What do you get if you cross a trout with an apartment?

A flat fish.

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Puns

Why was the moth so unpopular?

He kept picking holes in everything.

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Education

How many letters are there in the alphabet?

Twenty-four, because E.T. went home.

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Astronaut's baby?Science

How do you stop an astronaut's baby from crying?

You rocket.

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Music

What do you call berries playing the guitar?

A jam session.

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Animals

Why were the elephants thrown out of the swimming pool?

Because they couldn't hold their trunks up.

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Holiday

What do you get if you cross Father Christmas with a detective?

Santa Clues.

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Professional

What did the dentist call the x-ray he took of your mouth?

A tooth pic.

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People

Which celebrity always frowns?

Simon Scowl.

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Professional

Did you know you can actually listen to the blood in your veins?

You just have to listen varicosely.

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Puns

Why should you be worried about the calendar?

Its days are numbered.

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Political

Which former US President gets most confused for money?

Bill Clinton.

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Sports

Why was the stadium steaming hot after the game?

All of the fans left.

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