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What's a pitcher's favorite vitamin?

Vitamin K!

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a goalie dives to try to block a ball from making it into the netPuns

Which position in soccer always plans for the future?

A goal-ie.

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a close-up of a person filling out a multiple-choice test card with an alarm clock sitting nearbyVehicles

Which vehicle did the best on its SATs?

The Smart Car.

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Animals

What do you call a sheepdog's tail that can tell tall stories?

A shaggy dog's tale.

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Puns

I used to be addicted to not showering.

Luckily, I've been clean for five years.

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Food & Drinks

Why did the cantaloupe jump into the pool?

He just wanted to be a watermelon.

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Puns

To whom do fish go to borrow money?

The loan shark.

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Animals

When is a black dog not a black dog?

When it's a greyhound.

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sit on the clock?Puns

Why did the person sit on the clock?

So they could be ON time.

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Outdoors

I can cut down a tree only using my vision...

I saw it with my own eyes.

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Puns

Do the mascara and lipstick ever argue?

Sure, but then they makeup.

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Entertainment

What did the baby laptop call her father?

Data.

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Puns

What does a cloud wear under his pants?

Thunderwear.

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Family

What do cubs eat when their mom is out of town?

Bluebeary Pop-Tarts.

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a nurse wearing blue scrubs and a stethoscope, holds a clipboard and smiles at the cameraProfessional

Why was the nurse afraid of camping?

Because there was so much poison IV.

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Animals

What kind of fish will help you hear better?

A herring aid.

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bird drinking?Animals

How many beers does it take to get a tropical bird drunk?

Toucans!

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