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What was Cleopatra's favorite day of the year?

Mummy's Day.

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People

What do you call an 80-year-old cheerleader?

Old yeller.

Puns

Why do cows like being told jokes?

Because they like being amoosed.

People

Why are the Middle Ages sometimes called the Dark Ages?

They had so many knights.

Vehicles

Where do oceans always buy their cars?

Shell-vrolet.

Holiday

Why didn't the skeleton study cardiology?

His heart wasn't in it.

Animals

What did they call the canary that flew into the pastry dish?

Tweetie Pie.

Mood Ring?Puns

Someone stole my mood ring!

I don't know how I feel about it!

Family

How did the baby tell her mom that she had a wet diaper?

She sent her a pee-mail.

Puns

My friend told me I had to stop acting like a flamingo.

So I had to put my foot down!

Puns

What did the worm say to the other when he was home late?

Where in earth have you been?

Drummer's daughters?Music

What did the drummer name his twin daughters?

Anna 1, Anna 2.

Puns

What does a cloud wear under his pants?

Thunderwear.

Animals

How do you spell mousetrap in just three letters?

C-A-T.

Sports

What sport do birds of prey love to watch?

Hawk-ey.

Vehicles

Why did the car excuse himself from the dinner party?

He had too much gas.

Professional

What do you get a lawyer for his birthday?

Briefs.