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What state is famous for tiny soft drinks?
Minnesota.
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Animals
What kind of birds do you usually find locked up?
Jail-birds.
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Current Events
Who isn't happy to get an Academy Award?
Oscar the grouch.
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Sports
Why did the mom decide to play soccer in her spare time?
Just for kicks.
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Sports
Why does someone who runs marathons make a good student?
Because education pays off in the long run.
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Animals
How does a polar bear build a house?
Igloos it together.
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Puns
What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?
Use a cowculator.
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Animals
What do you get if you cross a duck with a firework?
A firequacker.
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Puns
Wanna hear a joke about paper?
Never mind. It's tearable...
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Food & Drinks
What do chefs do in their spare time?
They go chopping.
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Food & Drinks
What do you call stolen cheese?
Nacho cheese.
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Puns
What occurs twice in a lifetime, but only once in a year, twice in a week, but never in a day?
The letter "E".
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Puns
How is life like toilet paper?
You're either on a roll or taking poop from someone.
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Puns
Why do people love getting letters from astronauts?
They have the best space stationery.
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Puns
What does the milky way call its ex-girlfriend?
Space-ex.
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Food & Drinks
What do you call a noodle in disguise?
Impasta.
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People
How do you talk to a giant?
Use big words.
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