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What sport requires no movement at all?

Channel surfing.

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Entertainment

What do you call a nearsighted cowboy?

Squint Eastwood.

greatest daughter?Family

What's it like to have the greatest daughter in the world?

Daughter: "Mom, what's it like to have the greatest daughter in the world?" Mom: "I don't know ask your grandmother."

Animals

What is the best way to keep dogs out of the street?

Put them in a barking lot.

Food & Drinks

What do you call a sad latte?

Depresso.

Outdoors

What sits at the bottom of the ocean and shakes?

A nervous wreck.

Animals

Why didn't the chicken cross the road?

Because he was a "chicken".

a cat wearing glasses and a bow tie sits next to a mini chalkboard with fish drawn on itAnimals

What is a cat's favorite math problem?

A box and whisker plot.

a close-up of many bumper cars in a rowVehicles

What did one car bumper say to another after the accident?

Don't get bent out of shape!

web designer?Puns

Take him out please!

My wife told me to take the spider out instead of killing him. Went out. Had a few drinks. Nice guy! He is a web designer...

People

Who is the worm's Prime Minister?

Maggot Thatcher.

The peppers?Food & Drinks

What do nosey peppers do?

They get jalapeño business!

Puns

How do locomotives know where to go?

They have a lot of training.

Entertainment

Why did the mirror cross the road?

To see itself!

Animals

What do you call the pig that does karate?

A pork chop.

Current Events

What do you get when two plants kiss?

Tulips!

a close-up of three horses sticking their heads over the wall of a horse stallPuns

What do horses say to greet each other?

Hay there.