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What is the best way to communicate with a fish?
Drop it a line.
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Animals
What is the definition of Robin?
A bird who steals.
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Animals
What is another name for a cow?
A lawn-mooer.
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Animals
What do you call a waterfowl that reads Herman Melville?
Moby-Duck.
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People
How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?
Rename the mail folder to Instruction Manuals.
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Sports
Why did the footballer hold his boot to his ear?
Because he liked sole music.
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Puns
How do you get a country girl to like you?
A tractor.
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Puns
Why do mice need oiling?
Because they squeak.
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Sports
Why did the crocodile run his mile so fast?
He had Gatorade.
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Music
What's a balloon's least favorite type of music?
Pop.
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Puns
What do naked fish play with?
Bare-a-cudas.
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Animals
Why was the horse so bad at dressage?
He was a one-trick pony.
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Puns
How can you tell if a tree is a dogwood?
By its bark.
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Puns
What do insects learn at school?
Mothmatics.
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Puns
Why was the robot so sleepy after her road trip?
She had a hard drive.
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Sports
What do two oxygen molecule friends call each other?
Air buds.
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Political
Which bureau of the US government has the best breath?
The Mint.
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