Subscribe for more jokes!

Thank you! Your submission has been received!
Oops! Something went wrong while submitting the form.
Fields marked with an asterisk (*) are required.
By submitting this form, you are agreeing to our Privacy Policy and Terms of Use

What happens to a dog that keeps eating bits off of the table?

He gets splinters in his mouth.

Looking for a specific joke?

Thank you! Your submission has been received!
Oops! Something went wrong while submitting the form.
Holiday

What do snowmen eat for breakfast?

Snowflakes.

Melon married?Food & Drinks

Why didn't the melons get married?

Because they cantaloupe.

Animals

Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station.

Sports

Did you ever hear the joke about a boomerang?

I don't remember it, but it'll come back to me.

Animals

What's a rabbit's favorite way to travel?

By hareplane.

Animals

What does a queen bee do when she burps?

Issues a royal pardon.

Puns

What is the difference between a fly and a bird?

A bird can fly but a fly can't bird.

People

Which celebrity loves to read?

Elliot Page.

People

If athletes get athlete's foot, what do astronauts get?

Missiletoe.

Science

Why was the math book sad?

It had a lot of problems.

Outdoors

Why did the snowman look through a bag of carrots?

Because he was picking his nose.

Animals

Why are elephants wiser than chickens?

Have you ever heard of Kentucky Fried Elephant?

Sports

When is a baseball player like a thief?

When he steals a base.

People

How do you find Will Smith in a snowstorm?

Just look for the Fresh Prints!

a close-up of a dog's nose and front paws sticking out of a white blanketAnimals

What do you call dogs that rarely bark?

Hushpuppies.

Animals

What did the hungry Dalmatian say when he had a meal?

That hit the spots.