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What do you get if you cross some ants with some tics?

All sorts of antics.

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Professional

Why couldn't the couple get married at the library?

It was all booked up.

a rhinoceros is running through a dusty savannah Animals

Why do rhinos charge?

Because they never carry cash.

Puns

What game do cows play at parties?

Moosical chairs.

Puns

Wanna hear a joke about paper?

Never mind. It's tearable...

Professional

Why was the air compressor dripping with sweat?

It had been running all day and night.

Animals

What's a bear's favorite movie?

Pirates of the Care-bear-ean.

Food & Drinks

Where can you have a Fry-day every day?

Grease!

a group of people wearing sunglasses are celebrating at a party with confetti Puns

Why does Satan just show up at so many parties?

Because people always speak of the devil.

Sports

Which goalkeeper can jump higher than a crossbar?

All of them, a crossbar can't jump.

Political

Which part of a tree makes the biggest decisions?

The Judicial Branch.

Animals

Where do frogs keep their money?

In a river bank.

Puns

What did the obituary say for the pot of boiling water?

You will be mist.

Travel

Where do fruit travel to on vacation?

Pear-is.

Puns

If you had to vote which one is faster, would you choose hot or cold?

Hot! Because you can definitely catch a cold.

two Mallard ducks are flying side-by-sidePuns

What birds always travel in twos?

Pair-rots.

Outdoors

Why do crabs never give to charity?

Because they are shellfish.