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What do you call the hen that regularly counts her eggs?

A mathmachicken.

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Sports

Why did the footballer hold his boot to his ear?

Because he liked sole music.

Animals

What kind of bull doesn't have horns?

A bullfrog.

a close-up of a person filling out a multiple-choice test card with an alarm clock sitting nearbyVehicles

Which vehicle did the best on its SATs?

The Smart Car.

Retired veggies?Food & Drinks

What do you call a retired vegetable?

A has-bean.

a clear plastic tub is filled with water and apples sitting on the ground with fall leavesAnimals

What animal won the bobbing for apples contest at the fair?

A bobcat.

Food & Drinks

What is the most attractive fruit?

A fine-apple.

a close-up of baby hawks in a nest with their motherFamily

Why are birds of prey such good mothers?

They keep an eagle eye on their kids.

Animals

What do you call octopus twins?

Itenticle.

Food & Drinks

Did you hear the crazy rumor about butter?

Well, I won't be the one to spread it!

Animals

What bird helps you stay dry?

A t-owl.

a bowling ball is striking a set of pinsSports

Why was the bowling ball anxious?

It was hitting pins and needles!

Food & Drinks

What do you give a sick lemon?

Lemon-aid!

Holiday

Why do skunks celebrate Valentine's Day?

They are very scent-imental.

Outdoors

What's the ocean's favorite song?

Surfin' USA.

Puns

What does the milky way call its ex-girlfriend?

Space-ex.

Food & Drinks

What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup?

Anyone can roast beef.