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What do you call a sad strawberry shake?

A blueberry shake.

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Political

How did Barack ask Michelle to be his wife?

He bought a ring, got on one knee, and said "Will you marry me? I don't wanna be Obamaself."

Puns

What happened to the dancer at Seafood Disco?

He pulled a mussel.

Sports

What's a decade's favorite sport?

Tennis.

Food & Drinks

What is the opposite of coffee?

Sneezy.

Sports

What's a bat's favorite game?

Batminton.

Mummy music?Music

What kind of music do mummies listen to?

Wrap music.

Puns

What kind of things does a farmer talk about when he is milking cows?

Udder nonsense.

Puns

Why doesn't Winnie the Pooh wear shoes?

Because he prefers his bear feet.

Political

What building always gets stains on it?

The White House.

Animals

What did the fish say when he hit a concrete wall?

Dam.

Entertainment

Which kitchen ingredient can also sing?

Grease.

Puns

Why were the flies playing football in a saucer?

They were playing for the cup.

Food & Drinks

Why did the woman get mad at her husband when she asked him to pick up six cans of Sprite?

He picked 7 up instead.

Puns

What is dry on the outside, filled with water, and blows up buildings?

A fish tank.

Education

What words make the best athletes?

Pro-nouns.

Animals

What do you call a sheep with no legs or head?

A cloud.