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What do you call a pencil that has two erasers?

Pointless.

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Professional

When do astronauts eat?

At launch time.

Puns

What did the ocean say to the beach?

Nothing. It just waved.

Mummy music?Music

What kind of music do mummies listen to?

Wrap music.

Outdoors

Why are playgrounds so good at dancing?

Because they got that swing!

Puns

Why should you wear leather when trying to stay unnoticed?

Because it's made of hide.

Food & Drinks

How does one gelatin greet another?

Jello!

negative numbers?Science

Did you hear about the mathematician who's afraid of negative numbers?

He'll stop at nothing to avoid them.

Professional

Did you take the patient's temperature?

No. Is it missing?

Outdoors

What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back?

A stick.

Animals

What did the hungry Dalmatian say when he had a meal?

That hit the spots.

Professional

Why do rabbits make good jewelers?

They can tell the best carrot.

Vehicles

Where do oceans always buy their cars?

Shell-vrolet.

Entertainment

What do you call a nearsighted cowboy?

Squint Eastwood.

People

What do you call an animal pop star?

Justin Beaver.

Holiday

Why does Santa's sled get such good mileage?

Because it has long-distance runners on each side.

Sports

What's a decade's favorite sport?

Tennis.