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What do you call a nearsighted cowboy?

Squint Eastwood.

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Animals

Why did the doctor let his dog help with his patients?

Because he had a lab coat.

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Travel

Where do fruit travel to on vacation?

Pear-is.

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Animals

What did one firefly say to the other?

Got to glow now!

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Puns

What sound does a witch's car make?

Broom broom!

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Puns

What do you get if you cross a sheep with a kangaroo?

A woolly jumper.

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Animals

Which insect is the smartest?

The spelling bee.

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Education

Why did the comedian keep telling jokes about chemistry?

He was looking for a good reaction.

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Food & Drinks

Why was the seafood restaurant being investigated by the IRS?

They were suspected of being a shell company in some fishy business.

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Puns

What's a shoemaker's favorite dessert?

Cobbler.

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a man holds his hand up to his ear and appears to be shocked while listeningPuns

When you die, what part of the body dies last?

The pupils... they dilate.

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a large orange tiger runs through powdery snowAnimals

Why couldn't the tiger run any faster in the race?

Because his opponent had him by the tail.

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Animals

What did the beaver say to the tree?

Been nice gnawing you.

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Animals

How do you spell mousetrap in just three letters?

C-A-T.

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Animals

What's a rabbit's favorite way to travel?

By hareplane.

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Family

What do moms say is bad for both family trips and sleeping?

A wet blanket.

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Animals

How does a squid go into battle?

Well-armed.

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