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What do reindeer say before telling you a joke?

This one will sleigh you.

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Animals

What do you get if you cross a frog and a dog?

A croaker spaniel.

Animals

What animal loves to sway side-to-side?

A lean-mur.

Puns

What do you call a pig thief?

A hamburglar.

Holiday

What was Cleopatra's favorite day of the year?

Mummy's Day.

Puns

What do you call an arctic cow?

An eskimoo.

The Seagulls?Animals

Why do seagulls fly over the sea?

Because if they flew over the bay they'd be bagels.

Political

Which part of a tree makes the biggest decisions?

The Judicial Branch.

Animals

What's a snake's strongest subject in school?

Hiss-tory.

Puns

What do you call a Frenchman wearing sandals?

Phillipe Phillope.

Holiday

What did Santa bring to the potluck?

Slaw la la la laaa, la la la laaaaaa.

Education

What color are all the books in the library?

Red.

Professional

How do lawyers say goodbye?

We'll be suing ya!

Sports

Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?

In case he got a hole in one.

Animals

Why don't ants get sick?

Because they have little antibodies.

Puns

What did the tomato say to the ear of corn?

Can you ear me?

Music

What musical instrument is the best typist?

A keyboard.