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What do mice bring on a picnic?

Ratatouille!

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Vehicles

Why did the car excuse himself from the dinner party?

He had too much gas.

Animals

What kind of bees hum and drop things?

A fumble bee.

Sports

What is a golfer's favorite bird?

They aren't picky, any birdie will do.

Outdoors

What's a bog's favorite sweet treat?

Marsh-mallows.

Professional

What did the lawyer name his daughter?

Sue.

Education

What do you call a pencil that has two erasers?

Pointless.

Puns

What did the rug say to the floor?

I've got you covered.

Sports

Why do managers bring suitcases along to away games?

So that they can pack the defense.

Entertainment

Why did the God of Thunder need to stretch his muscles so much when he was a kid?

He was a little Thor.

negative numbers?Science

Did you hear about the mathematician who's afraid of negative numbers?

He'll stop at nothing to avoid them.

Animals

Why did the frog have a long face?

He was un-hoppy.

People

What do a tick and the Louvre have in common?

They are both Paris sites.

Outdoors

Why did everyone want to be near the volcano?

Because it's just so lava-ble.

Puns

Why do mice need oiling?

Because they squeak.

Puns

Why should you be worried about the calendar?

Its days are numbered.

Animals

When should you stop for a glow worm?

When he has a red light.