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What do birds serve on Halloween?
Tweets.
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Puns
What do you do if you're afraid of elevators?
Take steps to avoid them.
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Animals
What animal loves to sway side-to-side?
A lean-mur.
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Professional
What kind of money do fishermen make?
Net profits.
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Puns
What did the worm say to the other when he was home late?
Where in earth have you been?
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People
What do people call Arnold Schwarzenegger in retirement?
The Exterminator.
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Puns
Why didn't the lamp sink in the water?
Because it was too light.
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Animals
Why could no one recognize the sheep?
He had a goatee.
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Puns
What happened to the dancer at Seafood Disco?
He pulled a mussel.
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Animals
Why did the wildcat have such a successful email newsletter?
It always had the best lynx.
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Animals
What do you get if you cross a trout with an apartment?
A flat fish.
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Puns
What's a henway?
About ten pounds.
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Holiday
Why does Santa Claus go down the chimney on Christmas Eve?
Because it "soots" him.
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Puns
Knock knock. Who's there? Nobel. Nobel who?
There's nobel... that's why I knocked.
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Food & Drinks
Why did the tortilla chip start dancing?
Because they put on the salsa.
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Food & Drinks
How does a taco bless the table?
"Lettuce pray."
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Food & Drinks
How does one gelatin greet another?
Jello!
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