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What did the tree say when his kid wanted an expensive toy?

Money doesn't grow on me, you know.

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The rabbit?Animals

What do you call a rabbit with fleas?

Bugs bunny.

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Coached Bank?Sports

Why did the coach go to the bank?

To get his quarter back!!!

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Holiday

What is a condiment's favorite holiday?

Cinco de Mayo.

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Outdoors

What boat is great at getting a deal?

A saleboat.

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Professional

Why was the air compressor dripping with sweat?

It had been running all day and night.

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Education

Why was school so much easier for cavemen?

There was no history class.

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Animals

What animal loves to sway side-to-side?

A lean-mur.

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Puns

What do you call someone who sees a robbery at an Apple Store?

The iWitness.

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web designer?Puns

Take him out please!

My wife told me to take the spider out instead of killing him. Went out. Had a few drinks. Nice guy! He is a web designer...

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Animals

Why did the man name his canines Rolex and Timex?

They were his watch dogs.

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Sports

When is a baseball player like a thief?

When he steals a base.

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Sports

What do two oxygen molecule friends call each other?

Air buds.

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Entertainment

Why did the piano get locked out of the opera?

It forgot to change keys.

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Entertainment

Which kitchen ingredient can also sing?

Grease.

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Family

What type of school do kids beg to go to during the summertime?

Sundae School.

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Animals

Why do spiders always know the answer to everything?

They're very good at finding things on the web.

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