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What did the rug say to the floor?
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Food & Drinks
What do fairies always drink?
Sprite.
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Professional
What's a dentist's favorite movie?
Jaws.
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Animals
What kind of dog loves to eat?
A Chow.
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Entertainment
What's the name of the winner of the chicken-eating contest?
The Lord of the Wings.
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Animals
What sound does a grape make when an elephant steps on it?
None. It just lets out a little wine.
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Animals
What do cats eat for breakfast?
Mice Krispies.
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Puns
How often should you make chemistry jokes?
Periodically.
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Puns
What's a henway?
About ten pounds.
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Education
Where do math enthusiasts go on vacation?
The Great Planes.
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Animals
What does a queen bee do when she burps?
Issues a royal pardon.
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Outdoors
How did the farmer fix his torn overalls?
With a cabbage patch.
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Professional
Why was the air compressor dripping with sweat?
It had been running all day and night.
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Animals
How do you stop an angry elephant from charging?
Take away its credit cards.
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Puns
How do locomotives know where to go?
They have a lot of training.
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Outdoors
Why is shrubbery so bad at being direct with people?
Because it always beats around the bush.
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Political
Why are bankers so good at American politics?
It's a system of checks and balances!
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