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What did the antelope husband call his wife?

Deer.

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Travel

Where do optometrists go on vacation?

Eye-celand!

Music

What's a chiropractor's favorite genre of music?

Hip pop.

Outdoors

Did you hear about the one with the skunk on a camping trip?

Eh, never mind. It really stinks.

Animals

What kind of birds do you usually find locked up?

Jail-birds.

People

What type of shoes in a ninja's favorite?

Sneakers.

Animals

What animal has 20/20 vision?

A see-lion.

Animals

What is the biggest ant in the world?

An elephant.

a view of the earth from the moon's surfaceCurrent Events

Why do the Moon and the Earth get along best during the summer?

Because the Earth finally warms up to him.

Sports

Where do old bowling balls end up?

In the gutter.

Leg Broke?Entertainment

Why do we tell actors to break a leg?

Because every play has a cast.

Puns

Why did the computer run out of money?

Someone cleaned out its cache.

Family

How did the cowboy greet his wife every day after work?

Howdy, partner!

Education

How many letters are there in the alphabet?

Twenty-four, because E.T. went home.

Animals

What's a duck's favorite TV show?

The Feather Forecast.

Entertainment

What do you get if you cross a science fiction film with a toad?

Star Warts.

Food & Drinks

How does a cucumber turn into a pickle?

It goes through a jarring experience.