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What did Santa bring the naughty soccer player?
COOOOOOOAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLL!
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People
Who is a Dutch cat's favorite actor?
Tom Holland.
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Puns
What did one dandelion say to the other dandelion?
Take me to your weeder.
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Animals
What animal loves to sway side-to-side?
A lean-mur.
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Puns
What did the ocean say to the beach?
Nothing. It just waved.
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Puns
How do locomotives know where to go?
They have a lot of training.
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Puns
Why didn't the lamp sink in the water?
Because it was too light.
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Puns
What kind of clothes does a house wear?
An address.
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Puns
Why am I no longer addicted to the hokey pokey?
I turned myself around.
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Education
What words make the best athletes?
Pro-nouns.
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Puns
Why do shoemakers go to heaven?
They have great souls.
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People
What do a tick and the Louvre have in common?
They are both Paris sites.
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Current Events
What do you get when two plants kiss?
Tulips!
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Puns
How could the dolphin afford to buy a house?
He prawned everything.
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Puns
What did the portable fan say to the ceiling fan?
Sorry, I'm just not a big fan.
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Animals
Where do baby cats learn to swim?
The kitty pool.
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Family
What branch of the military accepts newborns?
The infantry.
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