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What boat is great at getting a deal?

A saleboat.

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Puns

What animals love to close envelopes?

Seals.

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moon restaurant?Science

Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon?

Great food, but no atmosphere.

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Outdoors

What flowers rarely depreciate in value?

Mari-golds.

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Animals

Why did the big cat get disqualified from the Olympics?

For being a cheetah.

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Animals

What do you call a nutty dog in Australia?

A dingo-ling.

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Professional

What's a dentist's favorite movie?

Jaws.

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Sports

Why couldn't the skateboard pass math class?

It just couldn't get a handle on it.

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Holiday

What did the Gingerbread Man put on his bed?

A cookie sheet!

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Music

What did the windmill say when it was asked what type of music was its favorite?

I'm a big fan of metal.

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Professional

What's a ghost's favorite work schedule?

The graveyard shift.

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Education

Where do you go when you need an excuse to get out of something?

A lie-brary.

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Scrabble road?Entertainment

Board Game With A Twist

Yesterday I saw a guy spill all his Scrabble on the road. I asked him, "What's the word on the street?"

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Puns

What lives in the ocean, is grouchy, and hates neighbors?

A hermit crab.

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Family

How did the baby tell her mom that she had a wet diaper?

She sent her a pee-mail.

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Professional

What did the dentist call the x-ray he took of your mouth?

A tooth pic.

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Puns

How did the mermaid call her friends?

On her shell phone, of course.

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