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What boat is great at getting a deal?

A saleboat.

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Puns

What animals love to close envelopes?

Seals.

moon restaurant?Science

Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon?

Great food, but no atmosphere.

Outdoors

What flowers rarely depreciate in value?

Mari-golds.

Animals

Why did the big cat get disqualified from the Olympics?

For being a cheetah.

Animals

What do you call a nutty dog in Australia?

A dingo-ling.

Professional

What's a dentist's favorite movie?

Jaws.

Sports

Why couldn't the skateboard pass math class?

It just couldn't get a handle on it.

Holiday

What did the Gingerbread Man put on his bed?

A cookie sheet!

Music

What did the windmill say when it was asked what type of music was its favorite?

I'm a big fan of metal.

Professional

What's a ghost's favorite work schedule?

The graveyard shift.

Education

Where do you go when you need an excuse to get out of something?

A lie-brary.

Scrabble road?Entertainment

Board Game With A Twist

Yesterday I saw a guy spill all his Scrabble on the road. I asked him, "What's the word on the street?"

Puns

What lives in the ocean, is grouchy, and hates neighbors?

A hermit crab.

Family

How did the baby tell her mom that she had a wet diaper?

She sent her a pee-mail.

Professional

What did the dentist call the x-ray he took of your mouth?

A tooth pic.

Puns

How did the mermaid call her friends?

On her shell phone, of course.