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What animal always gets on everyone's nerves?

A badger.

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Holiday

If Santa Claus and Mrs. Claus had a child, what would he be called?

A subordinate claus.

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a bowl of orange, nacho-flavored chips sits on a tablePuns

What did the Dorito say to his son?

You're a chip off the old block.

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Music

What do you call berries playing the guitar?

A jam session.

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Puns

Why do people love getting letters from astronauts?

They have the best space stationery.

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Animals

Why was the glow worm unhappy?

Because her children weren't that bright.

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Animals

Why did the chick disappoint his mother?

He wasn't what he was cracked up to be.

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Animals

What do you call a woodpecker without a beak?

A headbanger.

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a pretty sunrise over the ocean and beachOutdoors

What song does the horizon sing every morning?

Here comes the sun!

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Sports

What stories are told by basketball players?

Tall stories.

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Animals

What kind of egg did the evil chicken lay?

A deviled egg.

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a close-up of a man wearing glasses smiling at the cameraEntertainment

Why couldn't a guy with glasses feel the force?

He didn't have jed-eyes.

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Family

What did the momma sea otter say to her ornery children?

You otter do what I say!

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Animals

What's a frog's favorite drink on a hot summer day?

An ice-cold croak-a-cola.

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Sports

Where do spiders play their FA Cup final?

Webley stadium.

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Food & Drinks

Why did the tomato go out with the prune?

Because she couldn't find a date.

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Food & Drinks

How does a cucumber turn into a pickle?

It goes through a jarring experience.

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