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It's Crowded!

This graveyard looks overcrowded. People must be dying to get in.

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Puns

What do you get if you cross a hen with a dog?

Pooched eggs.

Education

What do you call a pencil that has two erasers?

Pointless.

Puns

How do you find where a flea has bitten you?

Start from scratch.

Puns

How do you take a pig to the hospital?

By hambulance.

Family

What do you call an orchard full of relatives?

Family trees.

Holiday

What did the ghost eat at his birthday party?

I scream.

People

Who's a baby's favorite singer?

Lady Gaga.

Food & Drinks

Why did the ice cream truck break down?

Because of the rocky road.

Outdoors

Why was the bud so shy?

It just hadn't blossomed yet.

The Penguins?Animals

What's black and white and goes around and around?

A penguin in a revolving door.

Puns

Why is a fish easy to weigh?

Because it has its own scales.

Outdoors

What do you call a BBQ by the pool?

A swim meat.

Sports

Why did the footballer hold his boot to his ear?

Because he liked sole music.

Science

Why did the astronaut's restaurant on the moon fail?

The food was good, but there was no atmosphere.

a close-up of a large brown bat hanging upside downSports

What type of bat doesn't fly?

A baseball bat.

Animals

How do you care for a sick bird?

Tweetment.