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If you had fifteen cows and five goats what would you have?
Plenty of milk.
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People
Why can't the lifeguards save the hippies?
Because they're too far out.
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People
Which celebrity can be sedimentary, igneous, or metamorphic?
The Rock.
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Animals
What do you call the donkey with 3 legs?
Wonky.
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Animals
What medicine would you give an ill ant?
Antibiotics.
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Food & Drinks
Why couldn't the pepper go to archery practice?
It didn't habanero.
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Animals
What do you call a litter of young dogs who have come in from the snow?
Slush puppies.
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Puns
What happened to the city in France where the cheese factory exploded?
Da brie was flying everywhere.
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Animals
Why do elephants have trunks?
Because they've no pockets to put things in.
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Puns
Which position in soccer always plans for the future?
A goal-ie.
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Entertainment
Why did the piano get locked out of the opera?
It forgot to change keys.
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Animals
What do you say if you meet a toad?
Wart's new?
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Outdoors
What song does the horizon sing every morning?
Here comes the sun!
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Sports
Why couldn't the skateboard pass math class?
It just couldn't get a handle on it.
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Animals
Where do baby apes sleep?
In apricots.
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Puns
How do you know if a joke is considered a dad joke?
It becomes apparent.
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Animals
What did the duck say as he was buying chapstick?
Just put it on my bill.
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